Lately I have realized that I have put my love on clearance. What I mean by that is I have succumbed to the lowest percentage of love given and been content with it.
I have put my love on clearance by accepting the bare minimum from people who I know and love. I have accepted the sorriness of effort given in every way.
I have put my love on clearance by going out of my way to make other feel comfortable and expect nothing in return. Many nights there for others but having no one listen to my cry.
I have put my love on clearance by teaching others how to treat me. Mean may seem uncompassionate but I was ever so green to know to lean on the fake. Its really crazy ow people will misuse you. Truth is, they can give the bare minimum and expect everything and then some in return.
I have put my love on clearance by accepting the pain and strain of those near me and saying nothing. I’v become numb to the pain in my heart and have accepted that this is just another way of life.
I have put my love on clearance by accepting no text backs and one-sided relationships. If its just me then its not a relationship right?
I have put my love on clearance by letting friends become wishy washy and still accepting them. I haven’t watched my inner self and realized how it affected me.
I have put my love on clearance by creating a sense of apathy for myself. I’ve laid my heart down on the line for others expecting nothing in return, saving them from their pits of despair and anguish.
I’ve put my love on clearance by putting my heart for sale and selling it to the lowest bidder. There was no more negotiating this, it was torn into rags and all there was left were the tags .
But the rags of my heart were greater than I ever knew was possible. Undependable, unsustainable , unfathomable, imaginable greater than I ever knew how to mend.
So I took a dose of Jesus to numb the pain and all there was left was a stain. A crimson stain that washed all the rain, away in my heart and oneday the sun came out shining its light ever so bright .
I didn’t want to fight, I just wanted you to know that night may come……But joy comes in the morning.